Love Letter To Couples

For this one day of the year, my instagram page is blasted with images of happy couples beaming through selfies like two peas in a pod. This time last year, I would have sworn off social media for a few days to avert my eyes from the awkwardness of fresh wound. This time, I feel an inexplicable joy looking at the 15th consecutive story of people blossoming with smiles I have never seen before, and so I want to write something to celebrate all the couples in the world.

The sudden outburst of activity from acquaintances who I don’t keep up with or friends who only lurk and never post fills the usual doom and gloom of social media with a buzz. The only thing better than seeing a happy person, is to see the joy doubled, even if it’s on a stranger I don’t recognise. Sometime in the gaps of everyone’s shuttering lives, people fell in love. Acquaintances with whom the last conversation we had was about how they did not suspect themselves capable of love, are now happily attached. It is a reminder that magical moments happen even when unobserved, and the world is aglow with private bliss. I know that “something something social media is something something curated” and there might be a lot of behind-the-scenes not featured, but I think it is comforting to share the warmth of people’s celebrations and sit at the hearth of life even if it’s for brief moments.

To the loveliest couples, ignore the cynics who dismiss Valentine’s Day as superficial and performative. (I will however stand by my criticism that the Capitalistic machine part of Valentine’s Day, fuelled by chocolates and roses and tin-foiled helium hearts, should be challenged). It is refreshing how we all collectively agree that this day, we will let down our guards and be unembarrassed about our love. If nothing else, the day gives us an excuse to indulge in cheesy oversharing. I love the fumbling declarations of love, risky first “soft-launch” of a private relationship, and the unembellished photos of people inarticulate with love. If it makes you so happy you just need people to bear witness to it, this is the day to do it.

And for the longest time, I had struggled with how to reconcile single-hood and Valentine’s Day. We don’t all have to be lonely and bitter enemies of the glowing couples. I think I found a better answer: use this chance to celebrate. I am reminded of how in Nanyang Girl’s High School, my alma mater, we had the unique culture of ordering anonymous Valentine’s treats for our girl friends. They would be accompanied by hand-written pick-up puns from Google, and some lucky ones get to parade around with flowers or tin-foil balloons. We celebrated girlhood and the formative years of our lives without the confounding variable of boys. There was no jealousy — we were just happy to give because we had an excuse to celebrate and show love to people we cared about. I won’t belabour the point because my mental headspace is critical to me coming to this realisation, and me last year would have been hard-pressed to even listen to what I’m saying.

Finally, a cheers to the lovers and broken-hearted alike: may all your promises (to others and yourself) be kept, may your days be filled with picture-worthy moments, and may you accumulate joy to the point of overflowing so that you will share it with the world.