Intrigue

For the past hour I have stared at the ants

Crowding a dragonfly corpse on the top of the stairs of

Level three. I was frozen mid-step, on the climb to 

The dark sky beside the stars, to nowhere. 

It was to deal with a sense of loss.

If I could figure out how the ants on the outermost layers

Contributed to the lifting of the bounty, I could figure out

How to stop everyone from leaving. Unless

They took apart each bejewelled wing and in small

Digestible sizes brought it home. Break the beautiful

Painful things down. I could learn from that,

Instead of staring at scenes of death and the grace 

They move on and the normality of life and the 

Huge whites of the sky so big it hurts to speak

Past whatever is lodged in my throat. If I cannot help

But let go, I had hoped to say goodbye quietly,

To each face and each finger and search in them 

A part of the corpse we are taking apart and keep

Something once part of the sky, for memories sake. 

I had to settle for the empty rooms who will not be moved

By my words, or any amount of tears, mocking me with

Its indifference by trailing someone’s laughter like bait.

Hopefully I will be numb after staring enough,

Covering up the pain by kicking, ineffectually, soil 

Over dug up ground. It will be lumpy, for the shards

Of sadness are uneven and I can only bury so much

Evidence. Eventually the rain will come down to 

Smear the earth away and the ground will sink and forever 

Hold the shape of the hole I have dug, a keen reminder

Of the shape of the person I was and what was taken.

In the rain someone will take pity on me, hand me an umbrella,

Avoid catching a cold, or slip an answer to one question 

I have left unanswered. No? Is there nothing to be done

About everyone leaving? 

To the unbearable stillness after the party, the floor

Full of streamers and confetti and dead dragonflies, the

Loneliness of everything hanging in the sky, I ask 

Only, have you been happy?